sophie: honesty is an act of devotion
We’ve been following Sophie Wolf for a long time—there’s something truly magical about the way she helps people reconnect with themselves and discover what brings them joy. She calls herself a soul reader—isn’t that the most magical job title you've ever heard?
At sitre, we believe that intimacy is as much mental as it is physical—and Sophie’s work beautifully reflects that. Where many of us struggle to identify our true wants and needs, Sophie goes deeper, tuning into her own inner voice and helping others do the same.
When we met Sophie in Paris, we knew we had to stay connected - and this interview truly moved us. After all, how many of us really know what we want from life? Or what makes us feel good, especially in intimate moments? If we did, wouldn’t it be easier to ask for it—or to give it to ourselves?
We still have so much to learn from Sophie, and we hope you’ll feel as inspired by her as we do. Luckily, you can keep following her journey right here.
Hi Sophie, could you start by telling our readers a bit about yourself and what drives you?
Hi sitre family :) mmmmh where to start!
I’m French. I love food. I love to dance. I can’t live without music, flowers, or peaches. I’m part-time soul reader, part-time creative magician, full-time disco sweetheart. Nothing brings me more joy than being on a plane about to discover a new place. My heart beats in Italian, and my guilty pleasure is adding feta and lemon on literally everything.
Many people struggle to know what they’re truly in the mood for, especially intimately. How do you personally check in with your desires?
That’s a deep and interesting question — let me pour myself a cup of tea and ponder for a moment...
Coming back to my desires is, I believe, a life journey. A practice I’m tending to more deeply the older I get. I’ve always been quite instinctive — I’ve usually known what I want and what I don’t. But sometimes, we don’t know what we want intimately because we haven’t yet seen what else is possible. We don’t always know the difference between “what I should want,” “what I used to want,” and “what my body is quietly craving now.”
Personally, I check in through solo time. I know where I stand, what I crave, and what I need when I come back to my bubble and ask myself: “Wait — what do I actually want?”
Through your work, you have a special instinct in terms of helping people tune into themselves. How do you know when a desire is truly yours—not inherited, projected, or reactive?
Darling, that’s a great question.
I truly believe it all comes back to knowing yourself — knowledge is the beginning of wisdom — and to personal sovereignty.
When you begin to explore the many roads inside you… when you become curious about your inner and outer world, and start to observe yourself from an altitude of consciousness, you know what is yours, what belongs to your lineage, what’s your ego speaking, and what is not.
That — and a healthy dose of energetic hygiene! Clearing your aura daily is a non-negotiable for me.
It brings me back to my center and helps me declutter what’s mine and what’s not.
What does feeling truly connected — to yourself, or to another — feel like in your body?
It feels like soft electricity.
Like everything inside me exhales at once. My shoulders drop. My breath deepens. My chest opens — as if someone quietly unlatched a window from the inside.
Time slows down. I don’t need to perform or explain. I can just be. Whether I’m with myself or with someone else, true connection feels like my body saying: You’re safe. You’re seen. Stay.
How do you stay honest with yourself when your needs can feel inconvenient, vulnerable, or even disruptive
I’ve learned that the cost of ignoring my needs is always higher than the discomfort of honoring them.
So even when it feels messy or dramatic or “too much,” I try to tell the truth.
First to myself. Then, to others.
I remind myself: honesty is an act of devotion — not just to me, but to the relationships I care about. If something feels tender or disruptive, that usually means it’s asking to be tended to. Not hidden. That being said — it’s not always easy!
But I think our responsibility to ourselves, and to those we love, is to show up in the most honest way we can. Even if that means saying: I love you but I’m not okay with this anymore.
Has shame ever gotten in the way of exploring a desire — and if so, what helped you move through it?
To be honest, I don’t think shame has been a big part of my story — at least not in obvious ways. But I’ve definitely felt moments of hesitation, of second-guessing myself, especially when a desire felt bold or unconventional.
What’s helped me most is giving those desires space to breathe, without judgment. And speaking them out loud to someone I trust (bless my girlfriends!!!) Often, just being witnessed without being fixed dissolves the shame — or whatever was hiding beneath it.
I also try to remember that desire is not something to justify. It’s something to explore.
What would you say to someone who loves their partner, but doesn’t feel in tune with them intimately?
That’s an interesting one, isn’t it?
I think love and intimacy aren’t always braided in the same rhythm — and that doesn’t necessarily mean something’s wrong. Desire is fluid. Sometimes it needs space. Sometimes it needs new language. Sometimes it’s hiding beneath exhaustion, resentment, unspoken needs, or a deeper longing to be seen differently.
Once again, I think it all comes back to curiosity — and allowing each other to be curious about themselves and each other.
Not about what’s missing, but about what’s waiting. What does their body miss? What do they secretly wish their partner would ask, notice, or offer? I also believe a lot of misalignment in intimacy comes from unspoken truths.
Words left unsaid, needs that get buried in routine. For me, true intimacy begins with radical honesty and a willingness to be vulnerable.
But full honesty here, I’m far from knowing it all. I am walking this journey myself, step by step, mistake after mistake, curiosity after curiosity :)
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